Ahhh here it is, my first blog post EVER.  The one thing I can promise is I’ll try and keep things very real and relatable.  Fear is something that is and has been holding me back from many things, so I’m using my blog and writing as an outlet to help myself, move past my fears. My biggest hope in the process is that I can help, even one person to feel like they are not alone.  As I know, sometimes it can feel lonely and like you’re the only one feeling this way.

So why did I write a children’s book?  I have always enjoyed writing, as a child I would write stories at family gatherings and read them to my family.  I did enjoy reading as a child also, but in all honesty, I have not picked up a book for myself in a very LONG time, because umm well, kids!!! I, however, have read thousands of children’s books over the last few years. Reading for myself, is something I would love to get back into again. If anyone has any must read book recommendations, I’d love to hear them – post them in the comments below!!!

I started writing through my first maternity leave, but I never really thought anything of it. Just an outlet.  However, during my second maternity leave, someone from my hometown, published her own children’s book (check out her page www.bowandbearco.com – her book and site is ADORABLE). I had always wanted to publish a book, but never thought it was possible.  Also again, my fear and self-consciousness always held me back, so I just pushed aside.

During my second maternity leave with Emmy (my daughter), Covid was in full force and I was informed that I would not have a job to go back to after I completed my maternity leave….This was a hard pill for me to swallow.  I was really looking forward to going back to work.  I enjoyed the people I worked with and was really needing to get back into a routine and new normal especially after everything we’ve been through with COVID.  Then the thought of having to start a new job, at a new organization, meeting all new people and panic set in.  It is kind of funny that I decided to go into HR and interviewing is part of the job because I feel very uncomfortable in interviews and get SO nervous.  I second guess everything and my anxiety sets in. I also felt like such a failure and that I was letting my entire family down.

Back to my reason for deciding to publish my book… as I was still on maternity leave and home with the kids, I had ‘some’ time to think and start to plan. I decided to take all this as a sign.  The week before signing on with the self-publishing company, I received an offer from a traditional publisher. While in the end I decided that self-publishing was the route I wanted to take with my book, the offer gave me confidence (which I always lack), that my book was good, and just maybe other people would love it as much as I did!

I wrote something that I felt had a message that would resonate well with others, and it was something, especially over the last year and half, I was trying not to take for granted myself. That was time. Enjoying and being more in the moment with my kids.  While I still continually struggle with it, as my mind is CONSTANTLY racing, I know that children grow fast and while the last few years did not go as planned, it reminded me and hopefully others to truly cherish the small moments together with our kids and loved ones.  I decided to put my words and thoughts into a book and hopefully it becomes a reminder to squeeze your babies extra tight and take in the moments when we can, as nothing lasts forever.

As a mom, I most definitely know that not everything is always perfect, in fact, far from it. Motherhood and being a parent is BY FAR the hardest thing I’ve ever done.  But I know that children are not small forever, so when I look at my kids, I see such wonder and innocence and know they were given to me to love and guide and hold and get through life together.

I hope that everyone who gets a copy of my book – whether you’re a parent, grandparent, aunt, uncle, special friend, or anyone – I hope it can be a special keepsake and reminder of the things that matter the most in life, as I know we all need the reminder some time!